Transparency doesn’t mean showing your underwear!
Some of the best things I’ve learned and continue to learn every day are from the stories that others are so brave to share. Their stories are what inspire me to make change, or give me something to use to try to make my own situation better.
The reason I choose to share so openly about my own life experiences, is because it not only helps ME think and learn from what I write, but my hope is that each story or experience might help just one other person. Quite often, someone reaches out to me and thanks me for sharing because they are, or have, experienced a similar situation, and that in itself is what inspires me to keep doing what I do. I’ve been told so many times that I should write a book but for the life of me I can’t seem to figure out the process, until recently. I realized I could start blogging (with the help and inspiration from A Modern Homestead), and once I have enough material I can just copy and paste it into book form! Who knew it could be that easy?!
Thank you for the ongoing encouragement!
My intent is never to sound inconsiderate of the fact that there is ALWAYS someone going through something worse than I am, or that there are far more meaningful stories of experience to hear or read about. But all I have is MY story, and because I love to write I would rather write about things that might inspire others, rather than make up some erotic sex story about all the shades of my favourite colour. Which by the way is far more exciting than grey!
As transparent as I am about the life I’m living I was always told not to ever discuss finances so I don’t ever include being thankful for a pay day in my gratitude posts, mostly because I don’t want anyone knowing the best days to hit me up! And for the most part I choose not to talk about the bad stuff that comes my way now and then, unless it’s something I can use as an example or lesson that others may find useful in their own journey.,
Your story matters
Although I know that there are those who don’t care one damn bit about what I have to say, others do. And it’s for them I continue to write and (hopefully) inspire them in knowing they’re not walking alone.
The reason I recently shared about learning I had cancer wasn’t because I wanted anyone to feel sorry for me, it was because of the process I went through trying to figure out what was wrong with me in the first place. It was about the positive reactions I had received about it NOT being cancer, only to have the last doctor tell me the horrifying story of someone who didn’t fare as well as I know I will.
More like a “can you believe it” kind of story that just happened to involve a bad news story line.
However, what transpired from sharing that story has been nothing less than extraordinary and I didn’t know at the time that I was going to need all of the hearts, love and encouragement that have come as a result. Sometimes writing about an experience ends up helping ME instead of my initial intent of helping to inspire someone else.
Very seldom are my comments or suggestions to others offered in one or two sentences, and maybe my paragraph long responses come across as me having a bigger and better story than the one I’m responding to. On the contrary. I often come across experiences I can relate to because I’ve been there before and I realize that what I have to say may not always be helpful to others but sometimes it just might.
It really does help to share your story with others. Whether it helps someone or not there might be a little something that can help make a difference in their life. I believe if we all took the time to be a bit more vulnerable in life, it might not only help someone else but it might just allow you to not feel alone in your own journey.
What a better life it could be!
You don’t have to share everything
I’m not saying that we need to share the negative moments in life, the fights we had with our spouse, or how you had to hook up the dryer hose to blow hot air through your vents when you couldn’t pay the gas bill (however there might be someone who has never thought of that bit of ingenuity and just might find it useful). My belief is that if we share our stories with the intent of helping others and hopefully making the world a better place, then go for it!
There is so much we can learn from each other, and because of that I continue to learn something new about life every single day! Every positive reaction and piece of feedback I get by sharing inspires me more and more to work at being a better version of myself, so I can continue to be a guiding light for others.
As most of you know I have been posting a nightly Facebook post of what I’m thankful for each day and it really has changed my life. I started in 2012, not for anyone’s benefit but my own, and I haven’t missed a night since. Before I adopted the practice from a friend who does the same, I was climbing into bed with my worries of the day on my mind and waking up every morning filled with anxiety. Now the things I leave on my pillow when I’m falling asleep are the blessings in my life.
When one of the kids are struggling with something and come to me for a shoulder to lean on, I do what I always do and point out the positive side to their situation. Many times I’ve heard them say, “But that’s you, always having to find the positive in every situation. We’re not all like you”. Remember kids, you attract the same energy that you emit! Granted life requires balance so sometimes with good there comes the bad but the way to deal with it is to look at it as a lesson and not as something horrible.
Journalling publicly isn’t for everyone but a great place to start is in a personal journal. Just work at building the habit of making it a part of every day and you will start to notice a shift in how you feel and the way life starts to revolve around you. It works for me to throw it out to the universe, where everyone can see, and others often tell me the last thing they do before they go to bed is to look for my post, and that helps me stay accountable.
And I promise that through MY transparency, you will NEVER have to see my underwear, simply because I don’t wear any!